Who is this key?

…Javier Pastore?

…Simon Kjaer?

…Abel Hernandez?

…Salvatore Sirigu?

These important players are undoubtedly important elements of the future for our club – yet, they do not represent the most vital piece to the club. That honor belongs to this man:

Numero Uno

Yes. That’s right. One of the craziest men in calcio is the man we have to live with: Maurizio Zamparini. For all the insanities and firing sprees, he has made Palermo dream. A couple days ago, I was thinking what the team would be like if we were to be sold to someone else…and to be honest, it was a little unnerving. Where would we go from here? Would the new owner be a foreigner with no attachment to the team? Would he be a local businessman who might have a strong attachment to the squad but not necessarily have a good plan to run the team? Thankfully, we don’t need to worry about those things just yet – as it seems that Zamparini will be along for the ride for the near future (see: plans for a new stadium). Perhaps, a most unlikely of sources, Luciano Moggi has stated it best in an interview with Mediterraneonline:

“Zenga is doing well, there needs to be some patience in life. When they take on young players they need to help them grow. Let me say something: I believe that Zamparini is one of those people that it is better not to lose because if Palermo loses Zamparini I don’t know who could substitute him and invest like he does, it is important to keep him chin-up, he’s one of those presidents that has money and the public would do well to love him. Zamparini is one who understands calcio. He knows how to conduct clubs. Last year he had an excellent season and he knows how to bring things forward.”

I think Moggi has summed it up quite nicely – so, let’s be thankful for Maurizio. Without him, we’d be looking at surviving relegation year in and year out.

News Roundup

Not alot to say about the match this past weekend. Sure, there were a couple of missed calls by the ref, but all in all, it was a game that was destined for a draw. We can chalk this one up to fatigue from the frenetic midweek game against Inter.

One interesting note from the Genoa game was the little sideshow from Marco Amelia. Even though he wasn’t playing, he attempted to create a story by telling the media he didn’t know why he was sent away. Well, Sabatini put that to rest by saying that, “Amelia knows very well how it went and there is no need to clear anything up.”

Our President also had some fun words to those who have been booing Pastore by saying that they are stupid and declaring them to be probably the same people who booed Cavani in his first appearances.

With the rise of Sirigu, it’s only natural that Rubinho might find his way out the door. According to Zamparini, “Rubinho has been a bit unfortunate, he’s a good goalkeeper but found Sirigu as a substitute who is doing well and earned a starting spot. He’s probably suffering as a result and we will find him another team because he and Sirigu are both starters – Sirigu for us, however, is a certainty.”

Finally, both Liverani and Balzaretti are targeting the Derby as the game in which they make their glorious returns.

Transfer Rumors

With January drawing nearer, Palermo has been linked to a ton of players lately. Here’s a brief summary:

- An Argentinian attacker named Sand is being linked with us again. He’s lighting up the Arab league with 9 goals in 5 games.

- German publication Bild claims that Palermo are interested in attacking mid Rakitic of Schalke 04.

- More news from Argentina as it’s being reported that Palermo are in talks for two different players: Dario Conca a trequartista for Brasilian side Vasco da Gama and Carlos Quintana a defender playing for Argentinian side Lanus.

Remember “First Appearances”

FORZA PALERMO!

So, until there’s more news, enjoy our new diamond in the rough.

Roma – Palermo

Overview:

It might have been those funky smellin’ sausages at dinner last night, but I’d rather think it was the game that made me use two rolls of TP last night. It’s been a long time since I a) saw such an ugly game, and b) got so pissed off at one of our players that I wanted to kick his face in trough the TV. I just don’t Ballardini sometimes. Hasn’t Guana disappointed him enough? I don’t know how many chances this humongous waste of flesh is gonna get from Balla.

Overall, I wasn’t too unhappy with the way we played and with the result. It’s not from these big budget underperformers that we have to take points. It’s from teams like Genoa and Napoli that we need to. Were there chances to win? Absolutely. Were there chances to get beaten 5-1? Absolutely. In the end, this game will (hopefully, but not likely) show the team that they need to step up once more and that we still have a long way to go before we can battle the likes of Levski Sofia, Lokomotiv Plovdiv and AA Gent.

Pagelle:

AMELIA: 6. Should’ve done better at the 2-1, was beaten by Carroz’ on the first.
CASSANI: 6.5. Plays great every week without being a match changer.
CARROZZIERI: 7. Unlucky when Roma made the 1-0, but manages to get every ball out of his area. The Wall.
BOVO: 6.5. Did well once more, but needs to get just that little better to be unmissable. Should fear Kjaer.
SAVINI: 5.5. Isn’t Balza, and isn’t Crapuano. Good defender, lousy attacker.
MIGLIACCIO: 6. Miggs = pure heart. Too bad Ginger Spice kicked him off.
NOCERINO: 6.5. One of his best games so far. True warrior.
LIVERANI: 6.5. Is in no way the same player as in the beginning of the season. Another fantastic assist. Seems like he’s playing for the shirt these days.
GUANA: Va scassaci la minchia, pezzo di merda.
BRESCIANO: 6. Not La Statua.
SIMPLICIO: 6. Not the Simplicio we’re used to.
SUCCI: 5. Came in, sucked away. As usual.
CAVANI: 7. Well-deserved goal, MOTM once more.
LEVAN: 7. Unbelievable that this kid doesn’t get more PT. Came in and caused danger. He’s a keeper.

Giornata 21’s Androberto Guarraciolo Award:

Midfield Minchia.

Highlights:

Fuck it. There weren’t any.

The Randomness.

And yes, there’s other news too. First of all there’s Marco Amelia. You know him, because when he was at Livorno he once said that it would hurt him to see Roma lose against Livorno. Well, last night, Marco said that it felt fantastic to see ‘the good Roma’ back in action. And that ain’t words to say if you’re playing for Palermo.

Added to that is the rumour that Manchester City would be after Mercenary Marco. Dubai FC is said to have made a 15 million euro bid, but Zampa said no. If a + 25 million offer was to come in, I hope Zampa goes for the cash.

And then there’s transfers…we’re still after Bogliaccino, and a deal is expected. But the big news seems to be the fact that we might field a full Uruguayan attack soon. Some sites like Mediagol already confrim Abel Hernandez’ arrival from Penarol for 5 million, others like Tuttomercatoweb say that it’s close. Still, signing an extra striker would be good to backup Miccoli and send Succi to the gulag.

And last but not least: Basel’s youngster Michel Morganella is said to sign a deal today in exchange for 4 million euro. Seems like we might send Guana along with Succi.

There’s another thing called the “Olympics” going on…and normally, I wouldn’t bat an eye if it weren’t for our boys the Azzurrini going for gold. And of course, the Azzurrini are being led by none other than current Palermo player and CAPITANO for the Azzurrini: Antonio Nocerino!

As you can see, Nocerino is the number four jersey and certainly looks great with the captain’s band around his arm. He and his fellow azzurrini put in a great performance today against Honduras. I know it’s only “Honduras” but they got utterly dominated in every facet of the game. Only after Italia was up 3-0 did the Azzurrini allow Honduras some semblance of possession and attack. We can all look forward to the next opportunity to see Nocerino and the boys play again.

Now, on to the random bits of Palermo news and info…

First and foremost, we learned today that PALERMO will kick off the Serie A season as the opening game against Udinese. The game will feature as the first of two games to be played on Saturday, August 30th. Ragazzi, take note of the date. Palermo will face an immediate test at the Stadio Friuli. Let’s go out and grab a full 3 points off the bat, and have Marco Amelia avoid Jimmy Fontana’s distinction last season as the Bottle of Wine recipient – the first keeper to allow the first goal in the new season receives a bottle of wine for having that “dubious” honor.

Palermo are currently training in Levico Terme where they’ve been taking on local sides in friendlies. They won today/yesterday by a score of 1-0. Jankovic had the decisive goal 31 minutes into the second half. He had a really nice shot off of a free kick that hit the back of the net. Colantuono was satisfied with the performance by the guys and singled out Miccoli, Jankovic and Carrozzieri in particular for their good play.

Palermo will face their “biggest” friendly in 5 days when they face the only Italian side in the Bundesliga. Oh wait a minute, that’s right, Wolfsburg is still a German team that is trying to field an all-Italian side. Nonetheless, two familiar faces will be wearing different colors when the match takes place. That, of course, will be both Andrea Barzagli and Cristian Zaccardo. If you click on Zaccardo’s name, you’ll see a great pic of him in some Wolfsburg get-up. Surprisingly, to me at least, Wolfsburg finished in 5th place last year in the Bundesliga, so they aren’t as bad as I thought they were.

Here are some other tidbits that are worth a mention:

Speaking of Guana, I have been thinking about this for awhile, and I am going to propose for the upcoming season, an award in his honor dishonor. In fact, it’s going to be named after both him and our other favorite nimrod, Andrea Caracciolo. It shall be known as the “Guaracciolo Award” and it will be given to the biggest bonehead in Serie A for that week. Ha! Knowing that Guana would be the recipient week in and week out if strictly kept to Palermo players, I’ve thought that we could expand it to all of Serie A. If anything, it should provide us with some entertainment throughout the season, as well as allow us to bust the balls of other crappy players on other Serie A teams. Perhaps, we can call upon Steven’s great photoshop skills to take the current photoshop of “Guaracciolo” and turn it into some sort of trophy-like appearance. Maybe in the form of an Oscar? Thoughts?

As the news happens, I’ll try and let you all know. For now, FORZA PALERMO!

As we all know by now, Milan has found a replacement for their fat, kinda gay lookin’, underperforming Brazilian. His replacement is, well, another fat, kinda gay-lookin’, underperforming Brazilian. In the meantime, half of Palermo still seems to be leaving and we’re after half of Serie A to replace them.

First, the good news. Sergio Floccari is not coming to Palermo. Sabatini blew up the deal, so he’s done his first good job. But Floccari probably won’t be staying in Bergamo, as another team is already on the look-out. Who? Genoa. That’s right, Foschi’s Genoa.

More good news: Emo’tino is getting playtime next year! At Triestina, but it’ll still be a chance for him to make some progress. Our other young potential, Edgar Cani, is close to a loan to Ascoli.

Seems like Udinese is after Mattia Cassani. Zamparini said he’s not going anywhere. I can’t blame him. I think you all might remember a little something called ‘kaboom!’:

Bresciano, on the other hand, is not untouchable. Not only is he transferlisted, but he’s even being offered to teams. Like Roma. They need a new benchwarmer now that Esposito is getting some playtime.

Too bad for Ricci, but Zigic ain’t coming. Zamp said that ‘he’s not needed at the moment’. Good, we can splash the cash on someone else. Someone like the person who said this yesterday:

“Per me è davvero un piacere ed un onore essere accostato ad una grande squadra e ad una società seria come quella rosanero.”

Wanna know who said that?

That’s right, Lil’ Abate. I love him. I love him like Martha loved Figo. And Vieri. And me.

And one last thing: we’re still after Michaël Chrétien, because Dellafiore seems to be leaving. A little more about him: he’s french-moroccan (which means he combines couscous with baguettes at dinner time), in six season he played 174 games for Nancy, scoring 9 goals. Oh yeah, and he looks like a tuffguy.

Lorenzo asked us who we hated most: Guana or Caracciolo. Behold…Androberto Guaracciolo!

Today was a pretty busy transfer day, with all the co-ownership deals happening. A small round-up:

* Marco Pisano is now officialy a Torino-player. A one way ticket to Serie B.

* Lecce’s back in A, so we are looking to reinstate our friendly gemellagio with the Salentini. Gianni Munari is staying in Puglia for another year, and if Miccoli isn’t moving to Lecce, we might loan out Cavani. Seems like a good thing: let the kid get some first-team experience, for all we know he might turn out to be the next Mirko Vucinic.

* Massimo Bonanni is staying at Samp for another year.

* The Moris Carrozzieri deal is finally done. 3 years, 4 million euros. First check the picture below, then hit the ‘more’ link to see that you don’t need to look human to score some fine ass if you’re a footballer. But don’t do it at work. It sure beats the Bovo-picture.

This one is the best, but it’s too big to put here. Enjoy.

So, what do we have left then? First of all, there’s the signing of Fabio Liverani, our first semi-Somalian ever. And our ugliest player until now?

Then, there’s the Amauri-transfer. Finally finished, bringing Nocerino AND Lanzafame to Palermo. Lanza has been swallowing his previous comments, and had this to say yesterday:

“Il Palermo è una grande squadra con un progetto ambizioso. Sono molto contento del buon esito della trattativa, più del successo a Tolone con l’Olimpica. Ho già parlto con il mister che si è mostrato molto contento del mio arrivo: sa già come impiegarmi. Vorrei che la stagione iniziasse domani.”

The Cavani-to-Lazio-for-Behrami soap has taken a new turn. Lazio is now interested in Miccoli. Too bad for Lazio, Miccoli ain’t going nowhere.

More transfer targets:

* Salvatore Aronica, who said he’s ready to leave Reggina. We’ll be fighting Lazio for him.

* Simone ‘The Beast’ Loria. Another ex-Atalanta player, and really good to replace Pusszagli.

* Marco Amelia, still.

Oh yeah, and Bresciano’s talking to Fulham. Get.The. Fuck. Out. Already.

* We’re still hunting for attackers. According to TMW, we’re after Triestina-striker Granoche.

He looks goddamn ugly, but he managed 24 goals in 41 games in Serie B. To get him to Palermo, Primavera-striker Davis Curiale might be shipped off to Trieste. Curiale is also wanted by Bari and Bologna.

* Bologna also wants Federico Agliardi. Nice, get him off the island as soon as possible.

* The Liverani-transfer should come to a close today, Floccari might be a Palermitano later this week.

* Zamp and Fioremerda have an agreement over Cocksuckzagli. Now it’s time for the little fairy to discuss money.

* Later today, Cristian Abbiati may be announced as our new keeper. Atletico wants 1.5 million, Zampa wants to give it. Possible successor of Abbiati in Madrid: Marco Amelia.

* More suckers moving out: Napoli and Man Shitty both want Baldy Bresciano. Do you guys want some panelle with that?

* The ‘Foggia for Cavani’-rumours are getting louder and louder. I say we do it.

* Reggina-president Foti has decided to start being an asshole. He said he might let Salvo Aronica move to Palermo, but only if Ciccio Brienza can stay in Reggio Calabria. Hmm…

That’s all for today guys, enjoy!

* Ah, Mariano Grimaldi…what would a week be without his lunacy? Amauri should just fire his dildo-manager.

* The Marco Amelia-story might finally come to an end very soon. TMW says we’re close to signing the Azzurri-back-up, and that would be a relieve. Federico Agliardi, we wish you all the best for Serie B!

* The Liverani transfer could be decided by Saturday. Palermo have given the Florentine 48 hours to make a decission on his 3-year, 850.000 euros a year contract. He might be the guy to give something extra to the midfield, but I still don’t like him.

* We’re also still fishing in the Atalanta-pond. After Ferreira Pinto and Damian Tissone, it looks like we’re also after Marco Materazzi II, A.K.A. Moris Carozzieri. Too bad Udinese and Napoli are after him as well. I’d love to see him tear up some attackers at the Barbera next season.

* The Budan-transfer, just like the Liverani-one, might be close to happening. The Croatian is soon off to preparing EURO 2008 with his team, and Foschi would like to close the deal before that.