It’s crunch time still. Last week’s result was an overwhelming boost of confidence to the squad and let’s hope it carries them through till the end of the campionato. The game here is a tricky road test (as always) for Palermo but really does nothing for Siena. They’re essentially safe from any relegation talk and they have nothing else to play for. Nonetheless, Palermo would be wise not to underestimate any team when they play on the road.

After Udinese took it to Lazio today, they also enter into the mix for the final Europa spot. On a side note, CAN SOMEONE WITHIN THE ORGANIZATION BRING UP D’AGOSTINO’S NAME PLEASE!? I mean, is there a more obvious choice for Liverani’s eventual replacement then the Palermo native?!? Man, is that frustrating. He needs to be on the list as a potential transfer target. End of story.

The gameplan is pretty simple. WIN. No need to focus really on any other teams at this point as we, in essence, hold the key to our destiny. Let Rioma implode and figure out who will buy them, who they will buy, who they will sell, who they love one day and who they hate the next. And then watch all those things change after 2 days.

Onto the squads…

Squad Status

Palermo

CLAMOROSO!!!!!! Yeah, here I was thinking that everything was looking nice. It seemed as if the squad would be at full strength minus the usual suspects…namely, the Aussie and Mr. Ayo for Yayo. Then, a quick visit to mediagol reveals the headline: “EMERGENZA DIFESA
Palermo a Siena senza Kjaer e Balzaretti” Great. Balzaretti is sick with a fever and Kjaer has been having muscle problems in his calf it appears. So it looks like we’ll be seeing Miggy holding down the role. And a Savini sighting.Madonna…

Probable Lineup:
Amelia; Cassani, Migliaccio, Bovo, Savini; Nocerino, Liverani, Bresciano, Simplicio; Cavani, Miccoli

A Disposizione:
Ujkani, Cossentino, Morganella, Kjaer, Tedesco, Guana, Succi, Mchelidze, Hernandez

Siena

Right. It’s Siena. Oh, Kharja had a cracker last week though. Earlier this week, Zuniga was listed as potential transfer target for Palermo. And we all love the hometown boy too. However, did anyone else see another hometown boy replicate the archer celebration today?! (D’Agostino!).

Probable Lineup: Curci; Zuniga, Brandao, Portanova, Del Grosso; Vergassola, Codrea, Galloppa; Kharja; Maccarone, Calaiò

A Disposizione:
Ivanov, Ficagna, Del Grosso, Coppola, Jarolim, Amoruso, Frick

Categorical Matchup

Rioma Transfer Target 1 vs. Rioma Transfer Target 2: Palermo. Amelia > Curci

ZOMG WHAT HAPPENED?! vs. Z Factor: Siena. I haven’t seen this many question marks in defense since I saw the Riddler on Batman the Animated Series.

Full Strength vs. Not Enough: Palermo. The midfield is at full strength for the first time in recent memory. That’s enough to tip the scales in their favor right there.

Record Breakers vs. Boring Palermo. Miccoli and Cavani are nearing the Palermo Serie A record for most goals by a duo with 25 to date. They’re after the ‘04-’05 version of Toni-Brienza who dropped 30. Ah, yes…memories.

Final Analysis

Win one for the Gipper! (Considering that Ballardini won’t be watching this one from the bench as he’s serving out his 1 game suspension for being awesome)

Form Guide

Palermo
WDWLW

Siena
WWLLW

Prediction
2-1. Maccarone, Cavani, Miccoli.

MOTM:

Miccoli

Remembering the Good Times

Se guardi in alto vedi
c’e’ un’aquila che vola
e’ il simbolo la fede
che sta nei nostri cuori….

Ed ecco siamo in gol
i rosa han fatto gol
la mia citta’ e’ in gol
io vivo per il gol
tifiamo tutti assieme
ed il successo viene con il gol!

I warriors, brigate rosanero, siamo forti e vinceremo!

Preview
What’s there to say about what happened to La Bestia that hasn’t been said? Nothing. I can understand that you like to go out clubbing, and that snorting coke can give you a throbbing boner and an incredible high, but not during the season as a professional footballer. So where does this leave us? One player’s antics have brought the team from optimistic to not so optimistic in two days. Not only is the sacking of Carroz’ gonna cost us a lot of money, it also means a big hole in the central defense in case one of Bovo or Kjaer gets injured. Imagine having to play with Kjaer en Cossentino in the back. The two of them combined aren’t even half as old as Maldini is.

The game in Milano couldn’t come at a worse time. We’re still fighting for that coveted European spot (altough it’s gonna be almost impossible now that Lazio and Samp are playing the Coppa final) and Milan can smell the second place. Luckily, we do well against the big teams this season. And we got a draw in Milano two weeks ago, which is good.

Squad Status

Palermo

Beauty needs to miss The Beast from now on, so we’re gonna see a Bovo-Kjaer partnership. Simplicio returns to take back his place as the provider of fine passes, and Micco will start over Succi. Guana’s back as well, and so is the Rijeka Fatman, who will provide the rest of the team with Big Mac’s during the second half.

Probable Lineup:
Amelia; Cassani, Carrozzieri, Kjaer, Balzaretti; Tedesco, Liverani, Migliaccio; Simplicio; Cavani, Miccoli

Bilan

Gianfranco at the Milan Offside is doing one hell of a job, so go and visit him for more info on Milan. I can already tell you that they will be missing Gennaro Gattuso, Marco Borriello, Alessandro Nesta, Kakha Kaladze, Daniele Bonera, Christian Abbiati, Giuseppe Favalli and Luca Antonini.

Probable Lineup:
Dida; Zambrotta, Senderos, Maldini, Jankulovski; Beckham, Pirlo, Ambrosini; Kaka; Inzaghi, Pato

Categorical Matchup

I Heart Roma vs. Butterfingers: Palermo. Milan may have the best defensive home record, that’s got nothing to do with the Brazilian between the posts. Marco will look to impress AS Bankruptcy once more, so expect a good match.

Beheaded vs. The Wheelchair Quartet: Push. Milan want half of our defense, we wan’t none of theirs. We’re equal.

Not the same guys as last week vs. I’m so Metrosexual: Milan. We seem to be rotating a lot in midfield lately, and I don’t know if that’s a good thing. Add the gay-factor of Milan’s midfield to that, and I don’t see us winning this battle.

Guido & Fabio vs. Tap-in Time: Push. Fuck Inzaghi, and fuck the Duck. Cavani’s on fire and Micco will want to prove himself. If our defense can avoid letting Inzaghi stand next to Amelia for 90 minutes, we’re safe.

Final Analysis

I’ll ask you: why shouldn’t we be able to take at least one point back to Palermo? Milan has only lost once in their own stadium, but we’ve beaten Juve, Samp and Fiorentina on the road and stole a point against Inter. And let’s remember that we have beaten already beaten Milan this season, even if they got two imaginary penalties.

The Carrozz’-case will most definitely have it’s effect on the players, but if you’re a pro, you have to shake things like that off, and continue with the things you get paid for.

Form Guide

Palermo
WLWDW

Milan
WDWWW

Prediction
1-1. Cavani, last minute equalizer Inzaghi.

Se guardi in alto vedi
c’e’ un’aquila che vola
e’ il simbolo la fede
che sta nei nostri cuori….

Ed ecco siamo in gol
i rosa han fatto gol
la mia citta’ e’ in gol
io vivo per il gol
tifiamo tutti assieme
ed il successo viene con il gol!

Saturday, April 11th, 2009 15.00
Stadio Buenos Aires, Milan

I warriors, brigate rosanero, siamo forti e vinceremo!

Preview
Funny story, the Adriano-thing. And to think that some of you wanted him to come to the island. Ha. Anyways, the One Italian-team is our opponent tomorrow, at the unholy hour of 3 o’ clock on a Saturday afternoon. I don’t know why, but it sucks. It means that I won’t be able to watch the game.

Aside from that, it’s not going to be an easy game. On the other hand, we managed to beat every other team in the top five at least once this season, so why wouldn’t it happen in Milan? Let’s face it, Inter will be underestimating us, and they might be a little shaken up by the Adriano-story. Added to that is Inter’s crappy performance of last week, where they needed an own goal to win against Udinese. Bad news is that we have never beaten Inter in the Meazza, so history is definitely against us.

Squad Status

Palermo

Still no Guana and Balkan Budan. What a waste of perfectly good picciuli that fatso was. For the rest of the guys, I’m picking up mixed signals. Bovo and Cassani are among the convocati, but are they suspended or not? If they are, we should fear another Savini appearance.

Probable Lineup:
Amelia; Savini, Kjaer, Carrozzieri, Balzaretti; Migliaccio, Liverani, Nocerino; Simplicio; Cavani, Miccoli

A Disposizione:
Ujkani, Morganella, Succi, Nonno, Abel Hernandez, Mchedlidze

Inter

Undisputed leader, probably the most talented team in all of Italy, asshole coach…and still, no European succes. What can you say about Inter? It’s not gonna be easy, that’s what I know. The good news is that Julio Cesar and Douglas Maicon are out.

Probable Lineup:
Toldo; Santon, Cordoba, Samuel, Chivu; Zanetti, Muntari, Cambiasso; Stankovic; Balotelli, Ibrahimovic

Categorical Matchup

Clean sheet? Really? vs. He’s alive!: Palermo. Toldo’s done. Marco’s confident.

Beauty plus Beast vs. Beast plus beast: Inter. Savini’s gonna fuck up. I can already taste it.

Heart & Soul vs. Spot the Italian: Inter. We’re good here, but Inter’s better.

Guido & The Wonderkid vs. Ugliest Attack Ever: Inter. Cavani’s one of the greatest talents in Serie A, but he’s no match for Ibra.

Final Analysis

Nobody’s expecting a win here. We just need to play well, win next week against Bologna and then try to steal a point against Milan. Every point is a point won, but I wouldn’t be heartbroken if we lost, as long as the boys put in a good performance.

Form Guide

Palermo
LWWLW

Inter
Boh…

Prediction
2-1. Ibra, Ibra, Cavani.

Remembering the Good Times

Good times? In Milano? Never happened.

Se guardi in alto vedi
c’e’ un’aquila che vola
e’ il simbolo la fede
che sta nei nostri cuori….

Ed ecco siamo in gol
i rosa han fatto gol
la mia citta’ e’ in gol
io vivo per il gol
tifiamo tutti assieme
ed il successo viene con il gol!

I warriors, brigate rosanero, siamo forti e vinceremo!

Preview

Palermo is taking on the other team from Verona this weekend. Both teams are coming off of big wins with Chievo surprisingly beating a lackluster Lazio side, 3-0. The win helped lift the lesser known Verona team out of the relegation zone…for the time being. Another crazy note is that Chievo have only lost once in 2009 – which is definitely noteworthy. Nonetheless, Palermo will be traveling to the Bentegodi to try and continue their form from the last two weeks as well as continue their rise in the standings toward a spot in Europe. Palermo face another test on the road against a lesser opponent, but this team hasn’t exactly provided the consistency we’ve looked for especially in winnable games. Let’s hope Palermo brings the same determination they’ve brought the past two rounds.

Squad Status

Palermo

Ballardini will be without one key player and three stooges. Miccoli is out due to yellow card accumulation. Meanwhile, the Tin Man Igor Budan will be missing his 1,325,359th game in a row, Bobby Goblin is still trying to find a new shoulder blade and the Aussie is trying to find some courage still having back problems. Miggy will probably start in Bresciano’s place. The big question mark is who will start along side Cavani? I’m afraid to say that I believe Ballardini is leaning towards starting Succi. He must feel obligated since the guy just had a mini-Succi. That’s unfortunate. But it also has to do with the fact tha Sneeze felt some pain in his calf the past couple days in training. We’re banking on Cavani again!

Probable Lineup:
Amelia; Cassani, Carrozzieri, Bovo, Balzaretti; Migliaccio, Liverani, Nocerino, Simplicio; Cavani, Succi

A Disposizione:
Ujkani, Kjaer, Morganella, Savini, Nonno, Abel Hernandez, Mchedlidze

Chievo

The good news is Chievo has a blog. The bad news is that it is a tad frivolous at best. There’s only one player who poses a constant threat on the team and that would be their marksman Pellissier. Other than him, the team is pretty much built for B – but that’s not really a slight at the team, it’s just a fact due to their recent promotion. Nonetheless, Palermo needs to be attentive.

Probable Lineup:
Sorrentino; Frey, Morero, Yepes, Mantovani; Luciano, Rigoni, Marcolini, Pinzi; Pellissier, Bogdani

A Disposizione:
Squizzi, Scardina, Sardo, Italiano, Colucci, Langella, Esposito

Categorical Matchup

Italy #2 vs. Italy #200: Palermo.

Four Horsemen vs. Four Jackasses: Palermo. The rosanero are at full strength in the back with Moris the Beast returning. That means a strong player starts on the bench – although don’t rule out a Kjaer appearance if Palermo need to protect a lead late in the game.

Heart & Determination vs. Pasta Noodles: Palermo. I can’t be the only one who thinks that Chievo’s midfielders all sound like various types of pasta noodles can I? I kid! Nonetheless, Palermo’s midfield might be stronger without a heartless Bresciano on the flanks, replaced by Migliaccio.

Baby-Makers vs. One-Man Show: Push. Anytime Succi finds his way into the lineup – even if it means he has to have a kid in order to find a spot in the Starting XI – is a time to start worrying about our attacking options.

Final Analysis

Nothing really to say here other than Palermo needs to find a way to win again. On the road. And without Miccoli. Wow, does this sound familiar to you guys at all? It should.

Form Guide

Palermo
DLLWW

Chievo
DLWDW

Prediction
2-1. Pellissier, Succi, Succi. SIKE!

Remembering the Good Times

Se guardi in alto vedi
c’e’ un’aquila che vola
e’ il simbolo la fede
che sta nei nostri cuori….

Ed ecco siamo in gol
i rosa han fatto gol
la mia citta’ e’ in gol
io vivo per il gol
tifiamo tutti assieme
ed il successo viene con il gol!

Preview

Well, here we are again in a similar situation that we’ve already been in about 3,464,342 times this season. The past two games have been dramatically different and both have been definitely unexpected. Palermo come into this game at home against our “cousins” from Lecce. Right now, the club has experienced some strange times – including Zamparini talking like a sane man – but then again, it could just be the medication he’s on. At least he’s not making the same wreckless statements that he’s known for, although he seems to have passed those duties onto Nonno. The boys in pink have A LOT to do in this game in order to win back the tifosi (and rightfully so).

The time is now to start winning games against teams that deserve to be beaten – especially in front of our own tifosi. I am more than confident that if our boys don’t come out with grit and determination, the tifosi will let them hear it. All I can say is that this team has provided more head-scratching moments than Paula Abdul on American Idol. There’s nothing more to say other than Palermo MUST win tomorrow, especially given our opponents current condition. End of story.

So, Lecce. Pretty bad season so far, but that’s to be expected from a freshly promoted side. They sit in 2nd to last from the drop on only 23 points. The abysmal performances have led to Mario Beretta being sacked last week after a stale 0-0 draw against fellow relegated relegation and last place side Reggina. With that said, Gigi De Canio will be in charge of his first game as the new Lecce coach against the rosanero.

Squad Status

Palermo

Ballardini has called up 19 players to face Lecce. Those missing out on the draw are the Aussie, Igor Boo-Boo, Moris the Barbarian, Bobby Goblin and of course, Fontana. Although there has been a lot of speculation coming out of the Palermo camp about a trident of Cavani, Miccoli and Hernandez in training, you’d have to think that Davide will stick to his usual lineup of 4-3-1-2. Good news is that Sneeze is finally back and will be on the bench.

Probable Lineup:
Amelia; Cassani, Kjaer, Bovo, Balzaretti; Migliaccio, Liverani, Nocerino, Simplicio; Cavani, Miccoli

A Disposizione:
Ujkani, Morganella, Savini, Nonno, Abel Hernandez, Succi, Sneeze

Lecce

Normally, here’s where I’d send you over to the Lecce page, but considering the erratic nature of the blog over there, I think I might just try to handle this myself. I mean, anybody remember Saint Antonio or this other gem? Oh well, no worries.

As mentioned before, Lecce is pretty poor. They don’t have much going for them other than Bikerman Caserta. Furthermore, they’ll be missing some “key” players for the match. Obviously, when you’re a relegation suspect, a “key” player most likely means a guy who can dribble and shoot with both feet. I kid, I kid! Out for sure are Daniele Cacia, Giacomazzi (remember him?) Ariatti and Esposito (not Mauro, the other one). Those in doubt seem to be Konan and Stendardo. It seems as though De Canio is leaning towards a 3-5-2 but one can’t be certain for sure. That said, here’s my Gazzetta’s lineup for them.

Probable Lineup:
Rosati; Stendardo, Fabiano, Schiavi; Antunes, Ardito, Zanchetta, Caserta, Munari; Tiribocchi, Castillo

A Disposizione
Benussi, Polenghi, Giuliatto, Basta, Edinho, Vives, Papadopoulos

Categorical Matchup

Marky Mark vs. Meh: Palermo. Marco has to redeem himself in front of the fans, but there’s no doubt he is a better all-around keeper than Rosati…even with one arm.

Pretty Boys vs. Pretty Awful: Palermo. Even without the ogre Moris, we still have a dominant edge at home with Kjaer and Bovo partnering up. Lecce’s defense has let up the third most goals in the league (41).

Aladdin & the Muppets vs. The Bikerman Gang: Palermo. The midfield had a good game last week with even Bobby Goblin playing well (note: sign of the apocalypse)! Lecce has a loaded midfield led by the ex-rosanero Caserta, but Palermo should have an edge in this category especially with Nocerino and Miggy providing appropriate cover on the flanks. It’s a bit defensive, but then again, it’s not like we have Lanzafame or Jankovic to come off the bench for some offensive push now eh?

Fast & Ugly vs. Toothless Attack: Palermo. All you need to know is this: Lecce haven’t scored in over 486 minutes of calcio.

Final Analysis
Miccoli will be facing his beloved hometown club tomorrow. I don’t see much motivation to score from him, but the rest of the team should be just fine. Then again, considering performances, Miccoli might want to put in some effort tomorrow otherwise he might be sold to Lecce at the end of the season and just in time for Serie B. This is the final push. Regardless of the past, we got to have the boys look forward and play every game like a playoff. Remember, the categorical matchups all point to a win for us, yet this team is maddeningly inconsistent. It’s time to change that and it starts with bringing a solid 3 points tomorrow.

Form Guide

Palermo
WDLLW

Lecce
LLLLD

Prediction
2-0. Cavani, Simplicio

Cavani!

If any of you have heard the song Novembre by Giusy Ferreri, you’ll enjoy this little tribute to Cavani based off the same tune (minus the guy who sounds like he has a cold).

Se guardi in alto vedi
c’e’ un’aquila che vola
e’ il simbolo la fede
che sta nei nostri cuori….

Ed ecco siamo in gol
i rosa han fatto gol
la mia citta’ e’ in gol
io vivo per il gol
tifiamo tutti assieme
ed il successo viene con il gol!

Sunday, February 15th, 2009 15.00
Stadio Oreste Granillo, Reggio Calabria

Preview
First off, I think an apology is in place. I have been neglecting you guys lately, and I feel pretty bad about it. I have an excuse though: I combine a full-time job with freelance writing, and I have been studying to pass my exams as an Italian interpreter/translator this week. Which I did. Two more years to go. And I hope this preview will make up for the neglect a little.

So, Reggina. All the way down in Serie A. Let’s take a look at the other teams surrounding the Reggio boys:

* Bologna: draw
* Lecce: draw
* Torino: loss
* Catania: loss
* Samp: win
* Chievo: win
* Reggina: win

Doesn’t look all that good, does it? To be completely honest: all of these games, except for the Samp one, we were on the loose. Now, we’re no longer The Joker, but more like Don Konkey: deep inside we’re still sick, but with the help of some pills we can manage to grab a hold of ourselves.

So what’s there to say about Reggina? Ever seen a bird ran over in the street, still trying to fly away although both it’s wings are broken and there’s guts everywhere? Well, that’s Reggina. It saddens me to see the team in such a state, but they will be playing Vicenza and AlbinoLeffe in stead of Milan and Palermo next year. Since Orlandi returned, they haven’t lost a game, including a 1-1 against Milan last week. Added to that is the fact that we have never won a Serie A match in Reggio. So it’s gonna be tough. But hey, if Juve can beat them 4-0, I think we may expect at least a 2-0 win here.

Squad Status

Palermo

It’s a weird situation this week. The backline is okay, Micco and Cavani will be fine up front, and Liverani returns. So what’s not good then? With Bresciano and Nocerino suspended, half of our starting midfield is out. And we all know what that means: Roberto.

Probable Lineup:
Amelia; Balzaretti, Bovo, Kjaer, Cassani; Migliaccio, Liverani, Guana; Simplicio; Miccoli, Cavani

Reggina

Since there’s no Reggina Offside anymore, I guess I’ll do the honours. Or Channel 4, it’s all the same. “They also suffer the blow of losing their second top League scorer Francesco Cozza – with four goals – to a one-match suspension, along with Maurizio Lanzaro. Antonio Giosa, Luca Vigiani, Franco Brienza, Giovanni Ceravolo and Edgar Barreto are all sidelined through injury.”

Holy shit. I mean, when you’re already knee-deep in the dark, brown juice, losing Cozza, Ciccio AND Barreto is just a huge punishment.

Probable Lineup:
Campagnolo; Santos, Valdez, Cirillo; Costa, Barilla, Carmona, Hallfredsson, Krajcik; Corradi, Di Gennaro

Categorical Matchup

Butterfingers vs. Reggio’s Hope: Push. Yeah, didn’t see that one coming, did you? Last weak, Amelia was sketchy to say the least. Campagnolo is not a top 5 keeper, but he’s sure doing good things for Reggina this season.

Kid’s got Skills vs. 3 Man Mistake: Palermo. We all saw what Kjaer is capable of last week. This kid has got a great future in front of him. Reggina’s fielding a three-man defense. The last team that tried that were two behind after 20 minutes. Big mistake.

Bald, Bald, Brown, Brown vs. Who That?: Palermo. Except for Halfredsson, I don’t even know these guys. Not even the presence of Guana will give Reggina an advantage here.

Best thing since sliced bread vs. Second String: Palermo. Our boys are playing at their best, while Reggina only has Corradi.

Final Analysis

See that advantage for us in the match-ups? That’s the same score as against Torino and Chievo. We all know what can happen when we underestimate an opponent, so I’m not gonna say too much about it. I have a history of jinxing these games.

Form Guide

Palermo
WWLLW

Reggina
LLDDD

Previous Encounters:

Hell no.

Prediction
No fuckin’ way.

MOTM:

Miccoli

Se guardi in alto vedi
c’e’ un’aquila che vola
e’ il simbolo la fede
che sta nei nostri cuori….

Ed ecco siamo in gol
i rosa han fatto gol
la mia citta’ e’ in gol
io vivo per il gol
tifiamo tutti assieme
ed il successo viene con il gol!

Roma – Palermo

Overview:

It might have been those funky smellin’ sausages at dinner last night, but I’d rather think it was the game that made me use two rolls of TP last night. It’s been a long time since I a) saw such an ugly game, and b) got so pissed off at one of our players that I wanted to kick his face in trough the TV. I just don’t Ballardini sometimes. Hasn’t Guana disappointed him enough? I don’t know how many chances this humongous waste of flesh is gonna get from Balla.

Overall, I wasn’t too unhappy with the way we played and with the result. It’s not from these big budget underperformers that we have to take points. It’s from teams like Genoa and Napoli that we need to. Were there chances to win? Absolutely. Were there chances to get beaten 5-1? Absolutely. In the end, this game will (hopefully, but not likely) show the team that they need to step up once more and that we still have a long way to go before we can battle the likes of Levski Sofia, Lokomotiv Plovdiv and AA Gent.

Pagelle:

AMELIA: 6. Should’ve done better at the 2-1, was beaten by Carroz’ on the first.
CASSANI: 6.5. Plays great every week without being a match changer.
CARROZZIERI: 7. Unlucky when Roma made the 1-0, but manages to get every ball out of his area. The Wall.
BOVO: 6.5. Did well once more, but needs to get just that little better to be unmissable. Should fear Kjaer.
SAVINI: 5.5. Isn’t Balza, and isn’t Crapuano. Good defender, lousy attacker.
MIGLIACCIO: 6. Miggs = pure heart. Too bad Ginger Spice kicked him off.
NOCERINO: 6.5. One of his best games so far. True warrior.
LIVERANI: 6.5. Is in no way the same player as in the beginning of the season. Another fantastic assist. Seems like he’s playing for the shirt these days.
GUANA: Va scassaci la minchia, pezzo di merda.
BRESCIANO: 6. Not La Statua.
SIMPLICIO: 6. Not the Simplicio we’re used to.
SUCCI: 5. Came in, sucked away. As usual.
CAVANI: 7. Well-deserved goal, MOTM once more.
LEVAN: 7. Unbelievable that this kid doesn’t get more PT. Came in and caused danger. He’s a keeper.

Giornata 21’s Androberto Guarraciolo Award:

Midfield Minchia.

Highlights:

Fuck it. There weren’t any.

The Randomness.

And yes, there’s other news too. First of all there’s Marco Amelia. You know him, because when he was at Livorno he once said that it would hurt him to see Roma lose against Livorno. Well, last night, Marco said that it felt fantastic to see ‘the good Roma’ back in action. And that ain’t words to say if you’re playing for Palermo.

Added to that is the rumour that Manchester City would be after Mercenary Marco. Dubai FC is said to have made a 15 million euro bid, but Zampa said no. If a + 25 million offer was to come in, I hope Zampa goes for the cash.

And then there’s transfers…we’re still after Bogliaccino, and a deal is expected. But the big news seems to be the fact that we might field a full Uruguayan attack soon. Some sites like Mediagol already confrim Abel Hernandez’ arrival from Penarol for 5 million, others like Tuttomercatoweb say that it’s close. Still, signing an extra striker would be good to backup Miccoli and send Succi to the gulag.

And last but not least: Basel’s youngster Michel Morganella is said to sign a deal today in exchange for 4 million euro. Seems like we might send Guana along with Succi.

Saturday, December 20th, 2008 18.00
Stadio Olimpico, Roma

Preview

Aah…it feels good not having to go trough another depressing week after another depressing loss to a second-tier team like Cagliari. Siena didn’t bring it, so we did. Without Miccoli, the expected damage control wasn’t even necessary. But this week is something else. The rosanero are travelling the Eternal City, for tea time with the boys in their silky satin baby blue shirts. Lazio were having a great spell after last year’s debacle when the season started, but now they’re in the exact same place as we are: in the belly. Close to the head, but also dangerously close to the shitter. SS NSDAP might have played a fine game against Udinese last week (coming back from a 3-0), but they have been waiting for a win for five games now. Delio Rossi’s ass is on the line, and he doesn’t like it.

‘Inconsistent’ is a keyword that can also be applied to Palermo. Beating the big guys, but failing against little teams, of which some are still hanging on to a Scudetto that was won over 35 years ago. Lazio is none of these. Lazio belongs to the same category as Udinese, Samp, Genoa and…err…Palermo. And as you can see, we lost our only game we played against a team in this category. But, that was another era. The Suit was still in charge and it was the first game of the season. Still, this is a game that could go either way. Difficult to predict, and sometimes too excited to watch.

Squad Status

Palermo

Nothing special here. Miccoli’s back after calling Banti whatever it was he said, so our attack is back at it’s best. There’s not a lot of things to be said: it’s the same as it always is, with Liverani on the field.

Probable Lineup:
Amelia; Cassani, Bovo, Carrozzieri, Balzaretti; Nocerino, Lverani, Bresciano, Simplicio; Cavani, Miccoli

Lazio

The boys over at the Lazyo Offside might do a preview. They even might not do a preview. In the end, Lazio will still be without Siviglia and will have to choose from one of Foggia/Pandev/Rocchi to be benched.

Probable Lineup:
Carrizo; Lichtsteiner, Diakite, Rozenhal, Radu; Brocchi, Ledesma, Dabo; Rocchi, Zarate, Pandev

Categorical Matchup

Playstation vs. Almost Carrozzieri: Palermo. The only real Romano between the goals is on top of his game lately.

Braveheart & Bovo vs. Shiite: Palermo. Rozehnal? Haha. Radu? Haha. Lichtsteiner and Diarrhea, a little less Haha. But our incredible backline kept a clean sheet last week, while Lazio conceded three.

Fozzy and The Butt-Pirates vs. Dunno: Push. The inevitable Hummuseater is still in the centre of midfield, but just like that pulsating purple-brown spot on your Pazzini, you learn to live with it. Lazio has Brocchi and two other guys to push his wheelchair.

Yes Eyebrows! vs. Past Their Prime: Push. Micco’s back and Cavani’s actually showing signs of talent, while Zarate is proving to be a one trick pony and Rocchi’s close to signing for Genoa.

Final Analysis

Although this game is a tad more difficult than the Siena one, not much has changed since last week. This is still a must win game, and with the line-up we have on our hands there is not a single team except for Inter that we have to be afraid of. I mean, this team trashed Milan. Too bad it’s in the Olimpico, where 13.453 farmers will be rooting for Rome’s countryside-team.

Form Guide

Palermo
LDWLW

Lazio
LDLDD

Prediction
I ain’t jinxing it.

MOTM:

Bobby Goblin’s manager, aka the Real King Of Comedy: “Milan is interested in my client as a replacement for Gattuso, but he won’t go to Milan. He wants to stay in Palermo, and fight for a spot in the starting line-up.”

Se guardi in alto vedi
c’e’ un’aquila che vola
e’ il simbolo la fede
che sta nei nostri cuori….

Ed ecco siamo in gol
i rosa han fatto gol
la mia citta’ e’ in gol
io vivo per il gol
tifiamo tutti assieme
ed il successo viene con il gol!

Portieri

Marco Amelia
I don’t think ‘bad’ is the word here. ‘Lacking self esteem’ or ‘underachieving’ is more appropriate. In defense of Marco: I think all of us expected just a little too much of him. He might have done better, but let’s not forget he still has to find his way into a top tier-team, and having our sketchy defense in front of him isn’t helping either. Amelia’s not delivering what we expected, but I have a good feeling that things will work out alright. Pagelle: 6

Jimmy Fontana
2008-2009 might just be Jimmy’s season too many. In general, he did a good job, but he’s just not the same Jimmy of last year. He doesn’t feel secure when coming out for a cross, he’s always out of the goal and his reflexes aren’t as good as they used to be. I think he can be a great mentor for Marco and Ujkani, but I strongly believe that his playing days have come to an end. Pagelle:6.

Samir Ujkani
Aah, the great unknown. Is he the future? I don’t know. No one knows. All I know is that he (and Amelia) could be feeling Salvatore Sirigu’s hot breath in their necks. He’s playing another fantastic season, and he just might be the next big thing. Pagelle: none.

Difensori

Ciro Capuano
ShitPants hasn’t played a game all year. That’s good. Pagelle: 10.

Cesare Bovo
It’s a good thing we got him back from Genoa. Him and Moris make one of the most fearsome defensive duos in Serie A. Is in the balance with Kjaer and Moris for the two spots in central defense, but seems to be sure of a starting spot every week. Is great at cleaning up the others’ mess. Pagelle: 7.

Paolo Hernan Dellafiore
Had three starts so far, but hasn’t impressed. Shows a lot of good will, but is in no way a contender for the spot of Bovo, Moris or Kjaer. Lacks confidence, ability to play his way out of trouble and most definitely: strength. Should be loaned out (to another team than Torino) to gain experience, but is needed in case one of the others gets injured. Is still young, but is coming very close to ‘make or break’-time. Pagelle: 5.5

Mattia Cassani
Was almost gone last year, but fought himself back into the team after that awesome screamer against Juve. His place at the right is almost untouchable, but had a setback against Inter, where he was unrecognisable. In my opinion, he’s better than Balzaretti. His crosses are better, and he comes back faster than Balza after an attack. Pagelle: 7.

Simon Kjaer
Surprise of the season so far. He’s young and talented, but we’ll need to look out that we don’t burn him just yet. Lacks the natural talent that other great defenders had, but he just could become the new Cannavaro if we take care of him and surround him with the right people/coaches. Is integrating well and has a powerful header, which makes him dangerous in front of goal as well. Kjaer should know that he’s in one hell of a position: he’s learning the technique from Bovo, and Moris can teach him how to use power in a duel. Pagelle: 8.

Federico Balzaretti
Untouchable at the left, too bad it’s not always because of his own talent. Is a fantastic player, but has been slacking a little bit in the last couple of games. Could benefit from a new left back. When his starting spot isn’t sure anymore, he will remember that he has to work for it as well. Had an absolute shitgame against Torino. Pagelle: 7.

Andrea Raggi
Played two games, both ending in disaster. Was brought in from Empoli as a talented defender, but has shown nothing. Strong contender for the Bidone’d Oro, is expected to be shipped to Torino like the rest of our defensive failures. Pagelle: 3.

Moris Carrozzieri
Least wanted signing before the season started, has fought himself in the hearts of all Palermitani. He’s ugly and as subtle as an atom bomb, but is keeping the defense together almost single-handedly. Looks like Caserta, but is better than Caserta. Pagelle: 7.5

Centrocampisti

Giovanni Tedesco
Four games, 59 minutes. Nonno is nothing more than a mascot, kept around to provide counterweight for the selling of other Palermitani Brienza and Rinaudo. Whenever he’s subbed in, he takes away valuable playing time from youngsters like Lanza. If Balla wants him on the field so bad, he should buy him an Aquile-costume and put him beneath the Curva for the entire game. Pagelle: 4.

Giulio Migliaccio
I don’t really know what to say about Miggy. Is being played out on the wing, but does better in central midfield. The only problem is that he’s barred by The Arab in that position. Has shown good thing, but has also been spotted while sucking away. Needs to find last year’s form again. Pagelle: 6.

Fabio Liverani
I think this one is clear. Every single year, our coach/Blowjobarini has a crush on the worst player in the squad. Guidolin loved Capuano and Guana, Colantuono had Guana and Agliardi and Ballardini has Liverani. Is one of the most experienced players in the team, but looks as if he’s on vacation. Half of his passes are bad or intercepted, couldn’t cross if his life depended on it and never comes back to defend. Should be shot, hung up or stoned to death, whatever it is they do to people in Somalia. Pagelle: 4.

Roberto Guana
Is not Balla’s friend. Should use more tongue and less teeth to regain spot in the starting eleven. Had one start, sucked away. Unless half of the midfield does a Superga, isn’t going to see a lot of PT this season. Pagelle: 4.

Maurizio Ciaramitaro
There’s not a lot to say about Ciara’s 41 minutes so far. It’s good to finally see him in pink, but he’s one of those guys that need a lot more time to develop into the player we need him to be. Was used as a right back in one of his games, which also isn’t helping. Pagelle: 6.

Marco Bresciano
One of this year’s mysteries. After a terrible season last year, he finally seemed to bounce back this year. But the further we get into the season, the more it looks as if Marco’s got some kind of personality crisis. He’s mixing good games with horrible ones, and sometimes can’t seem to control himself. Needs to start focussing, or start packing. Pagelle: 5.5.

Fabio Hernan Simplicio
Player of the season so far. Fozzy is everywhere: comes back to defend, cleans up Liverani’s mess, controls the midfield and is dangerous in the box. Just like Cassani, he was close to being sold but now is the undisputed king of the midfield. If we could just get someone who is an exact copy of Simplicio, we’d be a force to reckon with. Pagelle: 8.5

Antonio Nocerino
Does well, but as Zamparini already said: he’s not really bringing the things we expected him to bring. Maybe there’s too much pressure on him, but he’ll need to realise that this isn’t Juve. Coming in for 25 minutes when the game is already one isn’t going to happen. Has to give his all for 90 minutes. Is sometimes unfairly treated by the referees, but should let his actions speak. Pagelle: 6.5

Attacanti

Edison Cavani
Started out like the Cavani we all know, but then had an excellent spell with 4 goals. Too bad he morphed back to the old Cavani right after that. Is working hard, but doesn’t contribute enough goals and/or assists to remain undisputed. Has to know that his ass might be the first to get benched when Igor Budan is fully recovered from his injuries. Pagelle: 6.5

Fabrizio Miccoli
Not to jinx it, but Mighty Mouse is holding out fine. Is always complaining about little injuries, but is there when matchday comes. Scored six goals, but his source seems to have dried out now. That, of course, is also caused by the lack of good passes coming trough the midfield. Is becoming a team hero, but will have to work hard to make us forget Amauri. Pagelle: 7.5

Davide Succi
Became the lead actor in this year’s ‘Candid Camera Turns Real’-show. 88 minutes so far, isn’t likely to get more. Might be shipped off to Lucchese or Gela in January. Pagelle: 3.

Igor Budan
Four times subbed in, an hour of playing time. Needs to start 2-3 games to regain his Parma-form, but that shouldn’t be a problem. Pagelle: none.

Davide Lanzafame
Is in the same situation as Budan, but his fate is in his own hands. Needs to show Ballardini that he deserves a starting spot, and not just sit back and wait for it to be handed to him. Pagelle: 6.

Levan Mchedlidze
Came back injured from an international fixture and hasn’t played since, but did give us the game against Juve. Shows potential, but needs to grow. Pagelle: 6.5

Now you know my feeling about our players. As for the team, I’ll make it short. We need some reinforcements in all areas. Maybe Ujkani should be loaned out and Sirigu brought back to give Amelia some more competition, we need a new back, a good winger and central midfielder, and of course a powerful striker. Not another kid that gets pushed away by the likes of Walter Samuel and Philippe Mexes.

Saturday, November 8th, 2008 18.00
Stadio Olimpico, Torino

Palermo Boys, we are here. We beat your women and drink their beer, Palermo Boys, we are here.

Preview

Aah, games against relegation battlers. Don’t you just hate them? See, that’s when you know you’re not one of the big boys yet: when you shit your pants every time the schedule deals you with a wounded animal. And why do we shit our pants? Two reasons: 1) losing points against these teams is a disaster, both for our street cred and for the standings, and b) we know we suck against wounded animals.

Still, we managed to blow away Chievo last week, so maybe that’s a good sign. I hope it’s a good sign, because two weeks after Torino, we get Bologna. That means two of the worst teams of the moment in two weeks time. But whereas Bologna might be revived by the arrival of Sinisa, Torino is just like Chievo last week: sad, crappy, uninspired and only one loss away from a new coach. We already took Iachini’s scalp, maybe we can get Di Biasi’s as well.

The squad may have found their fighting spirit back after last weeks win, but Balla still wasn’t completely happy. He still thinks we’re giving away too much in the back, and that we should take advantage from our shooting chances in stead of pissing them all over the goal.

Squad Status

Palermo

Alright, let’s see what we ‘ave ‘ere then. Let me start with a little quote:

“”Le mie condizioni fisiche sono buone. Sono in grado di giocare contro il Toro.”

That’s right, Bovo is ready for the game. Let the cheering begin. As Raggi has injured himself while shoving a cucumber up his shitter without using Vaseline and Moris is suspended, it’s not hard guessing that Kjaer will have another start in defense. Guana and Capuano are also still out, while Marco Amelia is trying to get the final residue of butter from his hands. Liverani has ended his suspension, and Balla will be forced by Blowjobarini to play The Arab.

Probable Lineup:
Fontana; Cassani, Kjaer, Bovo, Balzaretti; Migliaccio, Liverani, Nocerino; Simplicio; Miccoli, Cavani

Torino

Ha, what can we say about Torino? The Granata. Toro. More nicknames than talented players. And yet again, as the Torino-blog is as dead as Roma’s title aspirations, it’s me who’ll do the honours. Good, let’s see. No Matteo Sereni in goal. Can I have a ‘hell yeah’? This means that Alex Calderoni will take his place between the posts. Not a bad keeper, but he ain’t not Jimmy. Matteo Rubin is suspended, and Natali, Abate and Il Capitano are injured. Corini’s absence is a shame. The role of Rosina in this game is still doubtful, as he has finally gotten in the big fight with Cairo everybody expected.

Probable Lineup:
Calderoni; Diana, Pratali, Di Loreto, Pisano; Colombo, P.Zanetti, Barone, Rosina; R.Bianchi, Amoruso

Categorical Match up

Clean Sheet Fontana vs. Back-up: Palermo. I think this is an easy call, no?

Wonderkid and SuperBeef vs. Lookin’ familiar: Palermo. Kjaer could take his chance to become the Captain of the defense, and he’s yet again partnered to a big, nasty motherfucker. On the other side, there’s Diana and Depeche Mode Tattooman. Remember?

The 3 Musketeers, with Pita vs. Nothing Special: Palermo. If anyone saw the game against Juve: this is one of the most uncreative midfields in all of football.

Goleador vs. Overpriced: Palermo. Cavani and Micco are going to humiliate Bianchi.

Final Analysis

Well well, four out of four in the match-up. This can’t go wrong, can it? Yes, it can. The feared Palermitan saturdaynight lazyness could come into action, or the midfield could get fucked up because of Sadam retaking his place in the line-up…lots of things could go wrong. But if karma is in the Olimpico on Saturday, the bull is gonna get assraped by the eagle. Torino lost 5 of their last six games, let’s make it six and seven.

Form Guide

Palermo
W L L D W

Torino
L L L W L

Past Encounters

10/02/2008 Torino – Palermo 3-1 Serie A
16/09/2007 Palermo – Torino 1-1 Serie A
01/04/2007 Torino – Palermo 0-0 Serie A
12/11/2006 Palermo – Torino 3-0 Serie A
29/02/2004 Palermo – Torino 2-1 Serie B

Prediction

0-2. Micco, Nocerino.

MOTM

Kjaer.

Remembering the good times

Sono Bello, Sono Sano, Mia Madre Mi Ha Fatto Palermitano!